The Hyggelig Journey

When you control what is possible and reasonable, you demonstrate discipline and determination. When you try to control the impossible and unlikely, you demonstrate desperation. Anxiety often stems from this very struggle—the urge to control what is beyond your reach. In itself, anxiety is an adaptive phenomenon, preparing you to navigate daily life. However, when you attempt to suppress it at all costs, you not only hinder your ability to adapt but also create another obstacle. Rather than seeking control over your anxiety, seek acceptance. This means allowing yourself to think and feel whatever arises, even when it is uncomfortable. When you try to suppress anxious thoughts, you create a problem greater than the thoughts themselves—leading to procrastination, fear, withdrawal, and despair. This, in turn, can give rise to pathological anxiety and coping mechanisms such as alcoholism or compulsive shopping. Recognising yourself as an anxious person is probably quite dif...

It is a waste of time and energy to be bitter about what you did or failed to do. A hallmark of expanding consciousness is recognising that the way you used to act was not healthy and that today you would not behave in the same way. The result of this realisation can never be a feeling of guilt. No one can be punished for a lack of knowledge. When you do not understand, you do not know what you are doing.

Shadows serve only to highlight the light. Fearful, fearless — just a matter of choice. A step to the left, another to the right. When fear does not sit at your table, you think light, think blue sky, think laughter in the afternoon. When it does, you think storm, hollow streets, the echo of something missing. But why feed what depletes you? Why give breath to the shadow, why make a home for the cold? Do not lean on what could go wrong. Do not cradle the weight of fear like an old companion. It does not guide you, does not serve you. It only keeps you awake at night, whispering doubts in the dark. Better to weave the day with lighter threads — expectation of good, certainty of warmth. Let thoughts be gentle, let them land soft, like leaves on a river. Repeat. Again. Again. Until thought becomes stone, root, truth. Until the mind believes and fear forgets your name. And when the shadows press close, when they whisper at your door — smile. Say nothing. Only think light,...

Some people are so accustomed to themselves as they are that abandoning what harms them requires a certain amount of time and effort—something that is not for the therapist to judge. I recall a patient whose chronic pain made the periodic use of medication essential for clinical management. Yet, she was reluctant to rely on it. Her refusal to take any medication stemmed from a fear of becoming dependent on it. She associated it with a previous experience, where it took her far too long to wean herself off an antidepressant she had used daily. However, this was now a reheated emotion. What could have been resolved in a few follow-up appointments—if not the worst of the crisis at least—stretched into a long journey of many interventions. But, given her self-imposed limitations, perhaps that was the time she needed and was capable of allowing herself. The most painful part of humanised listening is knowing that much of what is advised and prescribed will be ignored by the patient. Hel...

Once, in a classroom, a professor told us that his clientele was equally divided into two parts. One part consisted of patients who visited his office out of necessity or curiosity. The other half, he told us, was made up of the ghosts of those people. The professor was not emphasising any religious experience — nothing of the sort. Rather, he was illustrating the phenomenon of emotional codependency. Many of the people who visited the clinic would report their experience to friends and colleagues, who, in turn, would only begin to take an interest as they observed changes in the patients. To some extent, this is organic and natural, but it becomes codependency when the "ghost" can only find motivation to seek care if it is entirely dependent on another person’s account. The problem with this attitude runs deep. In many cases, it is a form of self-sabotage, postponing self-care under a pretext. These individuals lack the crucial understanding that happiness is ...

Any sensitive soul will feel discomfort when witnessing their plans and efforts retreat in the face of secondary factors beyond their control. How often does frustration arrive mercilessly, marking that moment with the weight of failure? The truth is, we are emotionally sentient beings who think. We recall our experiences more through our feelings than through objective facts. This is the human element of subjectivity. Despite being a natural occurrence, this same element gives contrast and meaning as life unfolds. And, since emotions have no expiry date, it is the moments we carry with us. It is an important baggage that defines experience. However, a word of caution is necessary here — it is extremely common to attempt to “outsource” pain. In an effort to cope with negative emotions, one may block any meaning associated with them. Unfortunately, it is convenient to remain captive to a narrative of passivity, as if saying, “That person only gets in my way,” “No one underst...

Letting go of what troubles the heart is never easy. Resentment, remorse, ingratitude, and moral suffering impose themselves — their weight a scourge upon the senses, making life seem strewn with thorns. Yet, in truth, no one passes through life untouched by inner turmoil. It is a universal language, woven into every existence. Strength of character, kindness, and understanding are never effortless; they are the result of conscious striving. The peace you carry does not arise from never feeling despair, but from mastering the ability not to be consumed by it. When a person realises this — that their journey has been shaped by hard-won victories leading to this very moment — obstacles still unsettle, but suffering loses its grip. Few pause to reflect on their own virtues while acknowledging their shadows, even selectively. The danger lies in failing to recognise one's own willpower and determination — for when these are overlooked, the shadows grow and obscure the way fo...