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Love

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Love has a way of clouding the sharp edges of our rational minds. I have spoken before about how objectivity falters when we turn our gaze towards those we cherish. This loss of clarity is never more evident than in the intimate entanglement of lovers. Neuroscience reveals that when we look upon someone we love, key regions of the brain — such as the amygdala, the frontal cortex, the parietal cortex, and the medial temporal cortex — quieten, as if surrendering to the experience.

The amygdala, our primal sentinel of fear and anger, dims its watchful intensity. In its silence, a deep sense of security and contentment blossoms, making love feel like the safest refuge. It is this neurological hush that allows us to trust so freely, to lay down our defences, and to offer ourselves with a vulnerability that would be unthinkable elsewhere. The frontal cortex, the seat of reason and judgement, relinquishes its command. In love, the need for meticulous discernment dissolves; we abandon our usual scrutiny and accept the beloved with a generosity we rarely extend to others. We seek, instinctively, those who judge us lightly, whose minds, like ours, are softened by passion.

Beyond this, love alters our very perception of the other. The regions of the brain responsible for "mentalisation" — the prefrontal cortex, the temporoparietal junction, and the temporal poles — become less active. These structures, which normally help us interpret the emotions and intentions of others, loosen their hold, allowing the boundaries between self and other to blur. It is in this dissolution of separateness that lovers experience their intoxicating sense of oneness.

A flood of dopamine lifts the spirit, making love feel transcendent, almost divine. Oxytocin and vasopressin, the architects of attachment, weave unseen threads between hearts, binding lovers in ways logic cannot undo. The amygdala’s retreat leaves behind an effortless trust, while the subdued frontal cortex ensures that imperfections fade into irrelevance. Love, in its fullness, is a surrender of the mind — an exquisite undoing that grants us, if only for a while, the illusion of absolute unity.

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