Skip to main content

Love

Love has a way of clouding the sharp edges of our rational minds. I have spoken before about how objectivity falters when we turn our gaze towards those we cherish. This loss of clarity is never more evident than in the intimate entanglement of lovers. Neuroscience reveals that when we look upon someone we love, key regions of the brain — such as the amygdala, the frontal cortex, the parietal cortex, and the medial temporal cortex — quieten, as if surrendering to the experience.

The amygdala, our primal sentinel of fear and anger, dims its watchful intensity. In its silence, a deep sense of security and contentment blossoms, making love feel like the safest refuge. It is this neurological hush that allows us to trust so freely, to lay down our defences, and to offer ourselves with a vulnerability that would be unthinkable elsewhere. The frontal cortex, the seat of reason and judgement, relinquishes its command. In love, the need for meticulous discernment dissolves; we abandon our usual scrutiny and accept the beloved with a generosity we rarely extend to others. We seek, instinctively, those who judge us lightly, whose minds, like ours, are softened by passion.

Beyond this, love alters our very perception of the other. The regions of the brain responsible for "mentalisation" — the prefrontal cortex, the temporoparietal junction, and the temporal poles — become less active. These structures, which normally help us interpret the emotions and intentions of others, loosen their hold, allowing the boundaries between self and other to blur. It is in this dissolution of separateness that lovers experience their intoxicating sense of oneness.

A flood of dopamine lifts the spirit, making love feel transcendent, almost divine. Oxytocin and vasopressin, the architects of attachment, weave unseen threads between hearts, binding lovers in ways logic cannot undo. The amygdala’s retreat leaves behind an effortless trust, while the subdued frontal cortex ensures that imperfections fade into irrelevance. Love, in its fullness, is a surrender of the mind — an exquisite undoing that grants us, if only for a while, the illusion of absolute unity.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Anxiety

Anxiety is a very generous word, so generous that it makes a lot more sense in the plural, anxieties. This is because, like a large umbrella, a load of elements can fit under it. However, despite its multitude of disturbances and manifestations, anxiety can be traced back to quite simple and predictable stress triggers. In its origins, it is much more visceral and organic than people imagine. A common trigger, for example, is hunger. You can lose hunger, overeat, stick to a crash diet, all as a neurovegetative expression of stress. Irritability is another trivial trigger. You are more easily irritated, frustrated, and angry over nothing, cultivating an inner anger, sometimes silent, sometimes explosive. Loneliness is also an important trigger. It is a complex feeling that includes inadequacy, weakened belonging, nostalgia for everything that has already happened and for everything that cannot happen. It is a mood that can be thoughtful, rueful, self-defeating, filled with needi...

Delusions

I've attempted to discover a quick way to deal with confrontational scenarios by interpolating empathy with courteous demeanour. While it didn’t interrupt confrontations, nor made them avoidable, it seems that begging to disagree can work, so long as you’ve have first learnt to mirror what is being talked in a different point of view. I like to call those exercises tools for mutual understanding. It took me a while to understand that it is natural for some people to showcase colourful disagreement only to capture a topic by exhaustion. Funnily enough, no words can interpret with precision what a subject matter can bring to a vulnerable person. I say vulnerable not to explicate people who eventually become vulnerable, oh no. We are all vulnerable to small stressors, too many of them, too many times. Triggers, say, of how much sentiment you will drill in a matter of seconds. More than that, it is a delusion to ignore them. That’s righteous okay, I need to add. Subjectivity is always ...

Remaining Attitudes

Sometimes one cannot just let it go. While I can understand why a patient would like to give up, if he is willing to put himself walking inside the hospital, I must comprehend he wants to keep fighting. Tons of medicines, exhaustive hours later and nothing has changed but a frightened soul. Walking in, walking out of his room, the pace seems unfair and unreliable; but then again, the patient remains fighting. Never truly could understand how it happens, whether that is due to faith, love, or some sort of primal instinct, but people fight for their survival more frequently than we can bare to imagine in their shoes. It is too easier and human to surrender, I guess, but it is so surprisingly godly to battle one cell’s battle. Maybe that is what makes us more human: our will, I am not sure. I watch this all, so erratic and alone in my own thoughts, slightly resilient than the day before on my attempts at understanding this effort. I wish I could say for sure to all of them “it will be alr...